Wednesday, September 30, 2009

True of Golf and Life

The secret to not hitting every shot perfect. The secret is getting the most out of the shots you don't hit perfect.

Ben Hogan

Beautiful Mer

Realized today that I failed to post this in July (tardy is an understatement).
Congrats MB and MB again! Doesn't Mer look gorgeous!

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Jess Berry Quote of The Day!

If only I could throw away the urge to trace my patterns in your heart, I could really see you.

David Brandon (Zen in the Art of Helping)

Friday, September 25, 2009

Jess Berry Quote of The Day!

In order to live, man must believe in that for which he lives.

Huston Smith

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Inner Workings Of The Stanford Junior Mind Part 8

***My Stanford Sophomore is now a Stanford Junior as of Monday. My how we grow up so fast!

A few days ago I got lost at work. Yes lost on my second to last day of work. Unfortunately the story gets worse.

I work at an engineering firm. The cubicles come in three shades, brown, gray, and orange. The cubicles are believe it or not aligned in a grid system. You'd think it would be easy to get around. Apparently I never quite grasped the idea.

My assignment was to push a cart with weights to another building (see diagram below, please disregard the out of ordering building letters, engineers are a little iffy on english). The weights were to be delivered to Frank. I looked on the company map and found his cubicle number as 43. I begin to push the cart, with the weights, about 30 pounds each to the other building. As usual the cart is loud, one of wheels doesn't quite touch the ground.

I get to building F and push the cart around looking for cube 43. After ten minutes I can't find the cube. So I decide to leave behind my loud cart and look up and down the aisles. After another ten minutes I find a reception's desk. I ask where cube 43 is, she says "Oh you are here to see Nancy? She is just around the corner?"

After looking up the correct cube, she directs me to the right to the other building. I turn left to find my cart. Unfortunately as I walk around the cubicles I begin to realize I've lost my cart. After another ten minutes I find my cart and walk back past the receptionist's desk.

I did find Frank.

Jess Berry Quote of The Day!

It takes a deep commitment to change and an even deeper commitment to grow.

Ralph Ellison

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Jess Berry Quote of The Day!

A good friend who points out mistakes and imperfections and rebukes evil is to be respected as if he reveals a secret of hidden treasure. - Buddha

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

The Yanks Are In Again!

The Yankees enter the playoffs for the 14th time in 15 years.

Life is Beautiful!

I can sense how happy Jack Berry is over this. You know that is why I love the game, the Yankees. Jack Berry. I feel close to my Grandpa, I feel our connection, it lives on through the game and the devotion to the Yankees. I know some believe that I am obsessed with the Yankees but those folks don't understand what is tied up in my love for the game. I have to be twice the fan for both Jack Berry and myself. I heart The Yankees and Jack Berry! Go Yanks! You've got the Berrys behind you.

Monday, September 21, 2009

Chocolate Cheesecake YUM!

Last week, our resident baker, Leilee, made this delicious cheesecake for a belated birthday treat. Delicious! Everything that Leilee makes is amazing but this could be her greatest masterpiece yet! Let's just say that we devoured that treat pretty fast. Hopefully my Cinnamon rolls match up for her birthday next week.
Thanks Leilee!!!

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Dodgers/Giants...always a great time!

Last week Bryce and Whit attended a Giants game for the very FIRST time! I am glad they finally made it to a game. Plus watching Giants and Dodgers fans is entertaining all on its own.

Did You Know You Can Outsource Facebook?

Email from Facebook Admin to MPR:

Subject line: Facebook Account # 553712019

Dear Facebook Customer,

The following changes have been made to your profile.

Name change: Mikey Page Richards

Relationship Status: Married to Adam Richards

Additional open requests have been accepted, declined accordingly.

Thanks you for your business!

Your Facebook Admin

***Unbelievably AWESOME!

What Matters Most To You?

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Guest Blogger CP: The Courtship Rituals of Single Mormons

***Editor's Note: CP is well worth the read. See his blog for more hilarious knowledge that should not be missed.

Good afternoon/evening/morning/post-apocalyptic ambiguous living period, oh readers of Ms. Jess Berry's blog. I'll be honest, I don't really understand the relationship between the "freakin' genius" and the golf tees sitting on top of this post, but I'm hoping you intelligent people will.

Also, I was going to title this post 'the mating rituals of single Mormons', but that sounds a little more risqué, and I don't really know who the audience is here. I sort of assume a lot of burly Idahoans, a-la Elder Christensen, a mission companion of mine who once claimed to have single-handedly killed a drunk bear with his bare teeth, then eaten said bear by the light of the full moon. Bones and all. So, you can see, I'm very invested in staying on your good side, oh Idahoans of ancient lore.

The readership here is, of course, vastly different from the readership of my own blog (the complete guide to everything), which is mainly paid friends, and various fake gmail accounts I run in order to make interesting comments*

That all being said, I should register that I am singularly (ha ha, get it?) qualified to speak on this subject, not because I am an amazing dater, but because we all know that you learn the most through failure. And given by the number of restraining orders currently out on me**, I'd say I'm pretty familiar with that.

Mormons begin the pursuit by going to church. That may sound odd (as church is slightly different from, say, a single's bar), but single Mormons outside of the Intermountain West are forced to huddle together in small congregations, desperately hoping that some beautiful single Mormon will move into the area from the Intermountain West. When one does move into the area, a pack of individuals, in appearance not too dissimilar from a plague of locusts, descends on the poor individual, and pester him or her until he or she moves away traumatized, or gets married (also traumatizing).

This doesn't always work, and so Mormons will pick up and go to singles conferences, not unlike the cougar conventions our older*** and more non-Mormon friends will throw. Cougar Convention in Palo Alto.

Singles conferences are generally a mish-mash of potatoes, forced spiritual experiences, talks about how all is not lost and stop being desperate, and speed dating.

Speed dating normally goes something like this:

Hi, my name is Bob!****
My name is Lisa!
Do you like the church?
Yes! Do you like bacon?
Yes! Do you like cheesy potatoes?
Yes! They are my fav.
Great, then, we should sit together afterwards and eat cheesy potatoes.
(Both scribble NO next to the other's name, while smiling)

Actually, conversations go nothing like that, because nobody would actually bring up bacon, lest the counterparty think you eat nothing but bacon, and thus have future potential for enlargement. The great thing about speed dating is you get to judge people on every tiny little word that comes out of their mouth. I once went speed dating, and it went like this:

Me: Hi! My name is Bob!
Them: My name is Jasmine!
Me: What a nice name! What do you like to do?
Them: Oh, I don't know, maybe watch T.V., like the Bachelorette, or movies or something.

I was conveniently able to screen said individual based solely on the fact that her top thing she liked to do was watch T.V.*****

Anyways, after two single Mormons meet, they then get to go on dates, which is sort of like hanging out, except one person pays, and it's a lot more boring. And stressful. Not only do you have to be attractive, smart, witty, and funny, you also have to present a spiritual persona. This is harder for some of us than others. In fact, some of us are only capable of acting like a deeply sedated version of Captain Hook while on dates. This makes dates less fun. More interesting, but less fun.

And after six weeks of boring each other in person, you decide there's nobody else in the world for you. Not that you found your soul mate, but it's likely everyone else in the world would bore you even more. And minimizing boredom is the key to any successful relationship. Or blog post.

Good luck out there, my single friends. It's a jungle. And my married friends, even more luck. And my non-friends, well, I wish you a slightly less amount of luck than my friends, lest I not have enough to go around. The luck o' the 1/32-Irish only goes so far.

*Oh, Chris, you are soooo witty! I wish you would come date me--I'm a 5' 10" Brazilian model who loves to take long walks around duck ponds. The girls up in the states must just crowd around you, knowing that you are so very desired!******
**I am, of course, joking. No restraining orders, just a bunch of unreturned phone calls.
***Let's not lie. They're not that much older. And we throw cougar conventions as well, but they're called mid-singles conferences. The modifier 'mid', when placed before the word singles, means 'freaking old'.
****Obviously not a real name. Unless you are actually Bob R., the man who met, fell in love with, and proposed to my good friend Ms. Ranger in six weeks. Now that is a great example of the courtship rituals of single Mormons.
*****This is not far from a real-world experience.
******It's a well-documented fact that women (and men) are more interested in someone who is desired. There was an awkward moment in life when I realized I pretty much only liked girls who were dating someone, mainly because someone was dating them, but also because there was absolutely no chance of me actually having to go on a date with them (and spending another three hours trying to not slur pirate).

Monday, September 14, 2009

Influences That Erode Faith

“First is doubt. . . . It comes from a lack of confidence in one’s self or abilities. It is inconsistent with our divine identity as children of God. “Doubt leads to discouragement. Discouragement comes from missed expectations. . . . Discouragement leads to distraction, a lack of focus. . . . Distraction leads to a lack of diligence, a reduced commitment to remain true and faithful and to carry on through despite hardship and disappointment. . . . This path ultimately leads to disobedience, which undermines the very basis of faith. So often the result is disbelief, the conscious or unconscious refusal to believe.”

Kevin W. Pearson, “Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ,” Ensign, May 2009, 40

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Birthday Day Celebrations

KT and BT took me to Nola's for my birthday dinner and....AMAZING! In the words of BT: Three beautiful women, plus oysters, plus crab cakes, steak, and gumbo = perfect night! Thank you both! The whole night was great! KT, you always plan and execute great parties. Love you girls!
Stanley Baines serenading me on my birthday. For those of you that aren't aware I've recently decided that I love being a groupie but like most things in life I pick a team (in this case a band) and I stick with 'em for life. A one band groupie is my style and Stanley Baines is that band! They did an amazing job! I could listen to them for hours. Thank you SB for making me feel special on my birthday! Can't wait for the next set.
Some of Whitegold made an appearance too...oh my oh my.
RH and I post party!

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

AR and MPR Wedding Day!

Winston Churchill said: "There is nothing wrong with change if it is in the right direction."
These two are definitely taking a plunge in the right direction. It was a beautiful, amazing day! When you live away from your actual family those you live with and spend time with become your family in your new home. Mike and AR are just that to me, my family. It has been an interesting and satisfying journey to watch with a front row seat. Watching AR and Mike look at each other after Mike was finished becoming gorgeous for the big day that morning before heading to the temple I could almost see into the windows of eternity. Now I am not sappy very often but last Saturday was an amazing, spiritual, and beautiful day as two of my closest friends became one. It was one of those rare moments where complete joy overwhelmed me to the point that my cheeks are still sore from grinning all day! Congrats Richards Family! Love you both!
Note Mike's shoes...
Mr. Texan himself and our resident makeup artist, HC!

SJ, Mer, and I relaxing...smiling and being beautiful is rough..
In their typical attitudes. :)
Yes there were JDogs (famous hot dogs in Provo for those like me that were clueless) at the reception. Only My Mike could pull this off.
Only fitting that on her wedding day she is pure (white) and I am the evil one in black. Yet we still look great!
Our little family...
Still wondering why Mike thought it was a good idea I hold the bouquet in the middle. We are crazy so I suppose this family photo is fitting for our personalities. Love these nerds!
Little Page and Little Chris
Benj and I outside the temple. I am so glad that AR and Mike got married and gave me the excuse to spend some quality time with Benj! He's one of a kind, a stalwart, a measuring stick for all men in my humble opinion! Thanks Benj for picking up us and a great weekend! PA misses you daily!
Possibly my favorite one...
HC performing her magic pre-wedding.
Documenting the day.
It is hard to take a serious photo when you are so giddy.
I am sure we were laughing "with" Mer at this point.
There we go!
All the friends with the bride and groom! We sort of like these two.
Hugging the beautiful bride! What a woman that Mike Page Richards is!

Jeter's Present To ME!

Jeter ties Lou Gehrig's Hits record with 2,721!!! Read and watch here.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Birthdays All Around!

September is a glorious month! I actually know a minimum of one person per day that has a birthday from September 1st - September 13th, followed by more on the 16th, 19th, 24th, 29th. See how amazing September is? It is a wonder that anyone is born outside of September. Friday night my folks met SEC (BFF) and I in Provo where we celebrated at a Brazilian BBQ Mom's bday (Sept 1st), SEC's bday (Sept 6th), and mine (Sept 10th)! All the meat you can imagine! Only fitting for a birthday celebration! Thanks Dadio! You made us all feel special!
SEC and I at dinner
Dadio and Mama Berry
SEC and I on her actual birthday (Sunday)! Her family made one amazing meal! It was so great that after two years of not celebrating our birthdays together SEC and I were reunited for the best week of the YEAR! I love SEC, my best friend and one of the family. We are polar opposites in many ways and that makes us work perfectly! Thanks for making me feel at home again!

Monday, September 7, 2009

AR and MPR Wedding Teaser

Love Adam and Mike!
Just a preview of the amazing day we all had celebrating AR and MPR!

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Hamilton Celebrates In Style

RH had a birthday this week and celebrated with an interesting bunch...see photo above for proof. Alright, let's be honest the only goofballs involved were WW, BT, and myself but seriously that's enough to really spice up any birthday dinner.
Pizza Chicago, mint brownie pie, mood lighting, and some acoustic serenading from MM and MK all the made the cut for this great girl's birthday!
I had said it before and I will say it again: I do heart RH! Glad we had a chance to celebrate YOU! (PS: RH makes me look even more white than I really am!)

Wedding Weekend Begins

(My brighter than sunshine yellow dress at T.Hammer's wedding)

After one missed flight we are finally on our way (well later today) to UT for the much anticipated AR/MP wedding. I've never been so excited to go to UT in my entire life!